Detachment

I was watching a movie the other night, and a word came up, and I thought – yes, that’s the perfect word for 2017. Detachment.

2016 was not one of the years I would remember as good or particularly important. It was emotionally draining: started as very promising regarding a long relationship I was trying to resurrect for past 8 years, culminated in an almost disaster in July and then winded down towards the end to a peaceful business as usual. I am basically in the same place where I was in end of 2015 and would happily pay a small fortune if I could forget 2016 as it never happened. That’s how significant it was.

Anyway… I am a bit fed up with always being there for everybody who needs me, uncoditionally, accepting literary everything that’s thrown my way without asking questions and giving my positive energy to those in need and being left drained, frustrated, empty and tired. Yes, last year’s word was “acceptance” and I lived true to it until almost the last day of 2016.

Don’t get me wrong – I love being there for people in need. The problem is, I cannot feel that point where I need to detach from their problems and to deal with my own. Because, my positive energy is not infinite, my helping hand is not made of steel and my heart not made of stone. I get too involved in what is going on. That’s why it’s “detachment” for 2017. I need to hold my own space for awhile and to replenish and refocuss. It’s not that I want to spend the year alone meditating in a cave, but something similar. LOL! Let’s see how it goes.

This is the first spread in Book of Days 2017. It was inspired by a spread Effy did in her class Facing Forward II (which I did not attend, but she was so generous to share this lesson as a bonus with us). I modified it a bit to include my word for the year. Speaking of classes, I did it again, I bought four already for this year. I was seriously thinking to give up Life Book this year, but then I decided I will enrol anyway – I could not bear the thought of all those wonderful classes happening without me 🙂

I also enrolled in Book of Days, obviously. Previously I bought Jane Davenport’s new class called Over the Rainbow, which will start end of January, and Juna Biagioni’s course Drawing in the Soul, which will start in March. It should be all for this year, I promised myself, unless there will be another new class by Jane Davenport, which I will not miss, because she is the most fun and amazing teacher I ever knew. So, I am fully booked for the year, and I am so happy about it.

January is the month off work for me. It’s been like that for the past three years and I hope it will continue. I have the most amazing bosses in the world who let me take time off for a whole month. I got so used to having the January for myself and find it essential for settling in the new year and getting myself started in the right way, according to what I planned. Not that I make big New Year Resolutions, no way, because I cannot stand the pressure, but I do detemine a general direction to where I want to move and think of ways how to move there. It works. Even though the direction can be wrong, like it was in 2016. But enough of that. It’s a brand new year, I practice detachment and have no regrets.

She Thinks Positive: 28-29

It’s been raining since last night. I felt a start of a migraine when I woke up, took the pills and now seem to be more or less fine. Here is just a quick update from She Thinks Positive Journal:

wp-1476954408914.jpg

These are the girls 28 and 29. These pages were gessoed before and I did not want to use my luminance pencils on them, so I skipped them and did the next two pages first and then went back to these two. Not so important though 🙂

I like the hair on the right one. Actually, not much of a hair, but I like the… Stuff… I think I will do more of this type. I quite suffered with the shading on her face, somehow I couldn’t get the chin part right I almost gave up and gessoed over, but I managed to pull it together and make her presentable.

She Thinks Positive Journal Update: 13 October

I had another 30 minutes last night and this morning, so I could finish my girl.

wp-1476343526501.jpg

Her look said that she knows herself, so that’s what her message is. I really enjoyed my new pencils. They blend so well and you can layer and layer and achieve this wonderful smooth look. The only little thing is that it gets quite shiny at some point, but in this case I am not bothered because it’s in a journal, but if it were meant for hanging on the wall, I am not sure what I would think. That’s one thing that you do not get with Polychromos.

Here’s a detail:

wp-1476348752203.jpg

Overall, I LOVE the pencils. I love them more than Polychromos, I have to say. Next week I am going to try them on better paper. This was in Fabriano sketching journal, which has rather thin yellowish paper. I have some white cartridge paper at my other place, so I am excited to see what happens there… And tomorrow, I think, it’s back to watercolors and doodling…

She Thinks Positive Journal: WIP

I am a bit frustrated because I could not find enough time to draw with my new pencils… I had less than 30 minutes this morning and I started a face in my She Thinks Positive Journal.

wp-1476265564497.jpg

It was raining this morning and it was very dark outside, so it was rather difficult to do the shading even with my lamp on. I did a light wash of watercolor and then continued with pencils on top. Here’s a close-up:

wp-1476265523643.jpg

It needs more blending obviously. I am continuing tomorrow. YAY! [happy]

Play Journal Update: 22 September

Just a quick sketch from yesterday in my Play Journal:

wp-1474525564660.jpg

Done in colored pencils with some watersoluble pencils for background. She knows she is pretty, but is not so self confident anyway. Something is bothering her…

Marie Planktoinette

I love Vitamin Sea course with Jane Davenport! The lessons are full of challenging content and bonuses and I am really learning and pushing my boundaries. I often feel out of comfort zone, which is unsettling and scary but so rewarding when I dive into it and experience the feeling of being able to do what I believed I could not. I am behind of course, but the course is open forever, no pressure and no need (and no possibility) to download videos. It’s awesome! This is what I did yesterday:

wp-1474368474450.jpg

It’s a collage on black acrylic background. Even the face is glued down. I drew it on printing paper with colored pencils and glued it with matte medium. The rest are drawings of Ernst Haeckel, royalty free, so can be used without worry. Have a look on the internet – they are amazing. I just printed them with laser printer and glued them down. So beautiful!

Play Journal Update: 18 September

The weekend is almost over. I did a lot of work and not too much art, but important thing is that I kept my practice and did something every day. Today I am giving you an update from my Play Journal:

wp-1474092346031.jpg

This was done at work on Friday, during lunch break and a long phone call. It’s partly based on a dream I had the previous night in which my late father was complaining about not inviting him to see my new home for many years, and partly on a weird idea I got about drawing a giraffe. The dude is the male figure from my dream (nothing like my father) and it’s pretty badly drawn I know, but that’s fine. The giraffe, on the other hand I love (I looked at a photo on the Internet for inspiration and reference). I did not know I could do any of this with just a ball point pen. I am seriously surprised.

And the next one:

2016-09-18-07.20.39_wm.jpg.jpg

I looked at some photos on the internet as reference, because I decided I should practice drawing from reference and not just from my imagination. The male turned out much better, but his haircut is gross and he feels very intimidated for that reason 🙂 And her I do not like much… Important thing is this is all done with colored pencils and no erasing, which is again a surprise for me. It’s good – practice makes me more confident.

It’s late and it’s raining… There will be no running in the morning, but I can always aim to do some arting instead. I hope we will get some more sunshine this week…